Why did the chicken cross the road?

QUESTION: WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

* KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.
* PLATO: For the greater good.
* ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
* KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.
* RONALD REAGAN: I forget.
* CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
* MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR: ... I envision a world where all chickens willbefree to cross   
         roads without having their motives being called into question.
* MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of   
        crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
* JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to 
       ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?'
* SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we werejustified in dropping 
       50 tons of nerve gas on it.
* GEORGE W. BUSH (2): We don ' t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to  
       know if the chicken is on our side of theroad or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against 
       us. Thereis no middle ground here.
* MOHAMMED ALDOURI: ( Iraqi Ambassador): The chicken did not cross the road. This is a 
     complete fabrication. We don ' t even have a chicken.
* OLIVER STONE: The question is not, 'Why did the chicken cross the road?' Rather, it is, 'Who  
    was crossing the road at the same time,whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken  
    crossing?'
* DARWIN : Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that 
   they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.
* EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken  
    depends upon your frame of reference.
* BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
* ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.
* ISAAC NEWTON: Any chicken in the universe shall always cross a road perpendicularly to the 
   side of the road, and in an infinitely long straight line at uniform speed, unless the chicken stops  
   due to anunbalanced reactive force in the opposite direction of the chicken's motion
* NELSON MANDELA: Never again, will the chicken be questioned for crossing the road. This is 
      an ideal for which I am prepared to die.
* THABO MBEKI: We need to establish if really there is a connection  between the chicken and  
    the road.
* ROBERT MUGABE : For all of these years the road has been owned by
  the white farmers, the poor underprivileged chicken has waited too long for that road to be given  
  to  him and now he is crossing it in force with his fellow war veteran chickens. We intend taking  
  over  this road and giving it to the roadless chickens so that they can cross it without fear of  
  retribution from Britain who promised money to institute road reform. We will not stop until all ro
* MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR: ... I envision a world where all chickens willbefree to cross roads 
    without having their motives being called into question. this is nice... and so is this one...